LISADARE BROCCOLI

Need a church?

2006-01-07T11:45:00.000-08:00

I was browsing the real estate listings in the New Orleans Times-Picayune and came across the following advertisment:

NEED A CHURCH? Church for rent in Algiers near Gen. Meyer. $800 per mo.

So, does anyone have use for a church?

Die happy

2005-10-30T15:29:00.000-08:00

I can now either die happy, or leave New Orleans fulfilled. I have officially won first place in a costume contest. As usual, I went way overboard and wore an itchy nightmare of a costume. (For those of you interested, I dressed as a Christmas tree. I think I sealed my win when I plugged in my tree lights). The best thing about New Orleans is that everybody goes too far every year: they spend too much money, too much time planning, and often cross lines of taste and politeness. Surprisingly, I didn't see one person dressed as a maggot-filled refrigerator, but hey, it's not even Halloween yet.

Normalcy

2005-10-27T05:02:00.000-07:00

The strange thing about living in a ruined city is that it quickly becomes normal. Humvees, armed men in camouflage, and military helicopters no longer draw stares and discussion because they look in place. The concepts of FEMA and "heads up their asses" have become synonymous to all. "How'd you make out" now means, did you lose everything in the world you had and/or any relatives? Nowadays that question is either met with a guilty "Oh I did fine; part of my roof blew off and I still don't have electricity but no big deal," or "well, I lived in [insert name of neighborhood or parish that no longer exists]." And, honest to God, a sympathetic "oh" and a small sorry takes care of your end of that conversation most times and you move on becaues it's old hat.

The city has become so normal in some ways that going out to eat is a regular option. It has become habit to call first to see if that restaurant is open, and to plan to wait a couple hours for a table, and to order from hastily-printed paper menus with limited options and jacked-up prices from waiters living in trailers in the parking lot.

Awkwardness

2005-10-20T16:48:00.000-07:00

My job in a hotel's "team member assistance center" now does not now primarily consist of telling people they have been laid off. I am now spending my days trying to help (or pressuring, depending who you ask) the 250 hotel employees residing there to find more suitable and permanent abodes. I have two main obstacles facing me:
1. Greed. Landlords have decided that the tight rental market in New Orleans justifies charging four times the normal rate for apartments. People are advertisting houses in my neighborhood for over $5000 a month.
2. Ignorance. We're supposed to be "teaching people how to fish," in the words of one of my overly optimistic and slightly naive bosses. And no, the fish reference has nothing to do with the smell of the apartments after tenants left rotting food in their warm refrigerators for a month. Instead, she means we should be pointing people towards resources and letting them do the rest. Our employees take that to mean that we're finding them all apartments and taking care of all the details.
Yesterday I tried to engage in the spirit of teaching to fish. Instead of responding to an ad by e-mail for an employee I gamely suggested she type it herself. When she looked at me blankly I even suggested the format for the e-mail (like, hey, leave your number). When she insisted that she didn't know how to use "this stuff" I said, no problem, just type it and I'll hit send. I looked down from a conversation a minute late to see she had gotten out three words - but no spaces between them, because she didn't know about space bars. Sorry to abuse the fish metaphor, but I let the poor girl off the hook and felt pretty silly about the whole fiasco.

In the Wake of the Aftermath of the Wrath of Katrina

2005-10-02T10:32:00.000-07:00

Here I sit taking advantage of my beloved and much-missed cable modem a little over a month after Hurricane Katrina. We have been here exactly a week and it's amazing to see how quickly things have changed since last Sunday. My neighbors who stayed for the storm and the hellish violence and chaos violence that followed it don't jump every time they hear a new voice or car engine. The radio stations that banded together as one to provide commercial-free news and hope to New Orleans are beginning to disband, play music and advertise; the radio stations that forsook the city and have been silent for over a month are returning to air canned sappy messages about rebuilding a better city. They're boring me silly with constant repetitions of the words "aftermath" and "wake" and the "wrath of Katrina." Hurricane Katrina was neither a boat nor an angry woman; could we please lose the tired cliches?

Last night there were lights in some of the buildings in the downtown skyline. More and more stores and gas stations are opening, although they run out of supplies quickly and close by dark. Restaurants are lagging a bit, though. The only open place we could find was an overpriced seafood restaurant. Last time we ate there we were the only diners. On Friday the place had a line out the door, an hour wait for food and the harried bartender walked out in the middle of her obviously miserable shift. The bar was packed five people deep, and she was the only bartender serving a large restaurant full of thirsty people, and yet customers were still ordering pink drinks in martini glasses and complaining. Serves them right that she left. I got my beer just fine, thank you very much. Remove cap and serve. Actually, my second one came with the cap still one it, but who was I to complain? It was Abita and it was cold.

"Cold" has suddenly become a very marketable concept in this city where even the people with power have decided that their refrigerators look a lot better sitting in their front yards, taped shut to keep the smell and flies inside. I heard reports of a Baskin Robbins store being open and people waiting more than half an hour in line for mediocre ice cream, bad service and nowhere to sit and enjoy their cones; last night we went on a desperate and futile quest to locate it. Daquiri shops have 20-car lines (if I have to explain that the lines are for the drive-through window, you're obviously not from here) and their parking lots brim over onto the street and other businesses. Like many other supplies, the only ice you can acquire is free, distributed by t-shirt wearing troops wielding mean-looking weapons.

I would love to be in the sign-making business right now as quickly-produced signs stuck in to median strips have become the main method of communicating around here. They advertise everything from restaurants and fast food places that are actually open to hastily-established roofing and restoration businesses, to job openings and official city information. It looks like election day around here, except that it's mainly restaurants running for office, instead of corrupt and inept policitians.

Regards to Katrina from Michigan

2005-08-30T11:29:00.000-07:00

I don't know what to say at all...we're still in shock after waking up this morning to the arial views of New Orleans underwater. I think our neighborhood's still mostly dry and somewhat intact - at least as of yesterday afternoon. I have on idea if we have a life or job or city or friends to go back to. If anyone's checking, as of right now John and Rudy and I are safe in Michigan with his parents. My library computer time is almost up so I guess I have nothing more to say. I just hope everyone is safe.

T-shirts spotted at a Gospel convention:

2005-07-16T09:27:00.000-07:00

"Spoiled by God"
"God was showing off when he created me"
"Jesus is my homeboy"

You know you're an adult when...

2005-07-10T19:32:00.000-07:00

you wake up from terrible nightmares - involving inadequate insurance for your home.

Not Feeling Funny

2005-03-22T19:24:00.000-08:00

I've been the most slacker blogger ever. I may even have lost my readership (aka Jeff and Daisy). This whole work thing is really cutting into my computer time. The fact that I am going blind is also a factor. But here I present to you, as promised, a half-hearted review of Martinique Bistro.

We went for an early dinner on my birthday last Sunday. We thought we might finally knock Galatoire's off our list of major restaurants we must experience before we leave New Orleans but I changed my mind at the last minute. It was my birthday and all I really wanted to do was relax in a low key place with some champagne and mussels. I'm not as hard to please as some people (um, Jeff) would have you believe. But I did want to eat in a courtyard.

The mussels and champagne were heaven on earth. We really should have stopped there. As usual, the entrees didn't live up to the appetizers. I'm pretty sure I had some sort of duck. I am a woman, so the fact that I don't rememeber in vivid detail what I had tells you all you need to know. I could give you a colorful (and accurate) description of the corned beef and cabbage I had in the cafeteria last week. Or the homemade tomato sauce my adopted Italian grandmother made ten years ago. But all I can remember is that I think I had some sort of duck and I think it was reasonably tender.

I also ordered a wonderful dessert of molten chocolate cake with homemade cappuccino ice cream. Although the cake was less than molten (actually, it was closer to lukewarm) the dessert was simple and wonderful. My only real complaint is that the dessert was actually too small. I'm quite sure that is the first time I have ever felt that any restaurant dessert was too small, but Martinique Bistro's skimpy portion left me wanting more. Oh, and our waiter was boring and overly serious. Blah, blah, blah.

Please don't hold the above review against me. Really, my enthusiasm, dare I say passion, for food and dining is rivalled by few. Like I said, this whole working thing is taking a lot out of me. Also, I have been told that one of my job functions is to be "a kind of cheerleader." (I work in human resources). Maybe I'm trying to counterbalance the forced cheeriness I dispense all day with this drab writing. Or maybe that job is killing my soul. This week my boss told me I need to use more exclamation points in my writing. How could one exclamation point in a 100-word article ever not be more than enough? Either way, I should probably warn you that my creative powers are hiding somewhere dark, curled up in the fetal position. They took my proofreading and grammatical abilities with them. I'm not sure they're coming back after a week like this.

Local Newspaper Sucks

2005-03-01T14:58:00.000-08:00

The New Orleans Times-Picayune has an interesting way of presenting the news. Check out the news headline from the New York Times (and pretty much every other actual newspapaper):

Supreme Court Bars Death Penalty for Juvenile Killers

and then the one from the Times-Pic:

Four young Louisiana murderers spared the death penalty

Actually, the one from the Times-Pic isn't really even the headline - it's half the story. Literally - there is only one other sentence in the article. This is certainly a different way of framing the same information.

Things that are not as good as they used to be:

2005-02-18T02:20:00.000-08:00

1. Wendy's hamburgers. They used to be so juicy and meaty (insert lame "Where's the beef?" joke here). Now they are about as satisfying as a scratch'n'sniff sticker of a hamburger.

2. France. Okay, well my dreams of visiting France. Sure, the country has an incredible collection of beautiful art and architecture that I would kill to see; and of course French cooking and wine are divine; and the movies are wonderful, and even when they're not they're still great because the sound of that lovely language spoken by the likes of Juliette Binoche is so pleasing to the ear. But then there are the French. I hate to sound like a damn Republican, but I hate French people. They are my least favorite customers to wait on - difficult, arrogant and cheap. One of the most unintentionally funny things a customer ever said to me while I was waiting tables was, "I am French. I eat every day." Her tone implied that I was too stupid and American to understand food the way civilized people who "eat every day" do, and that I should defer to her superior judgment. For the record, she was arguing that her lovely Louisiana oysters did not taste "French enough." Mind you, this was in New Orleans. Mr. Rudolph and I love to break this line out at slightest provocation (generally when intoxicated) in our froggiest voices. (It's a good thing we like each other, because no else does.)

3. Hangovers, or, rather, my ability to avoid them. For all you partiers under the age of 24 who think you're not ever going to get them...well, never mind. Just enjoy yourself. Have a few for me.

4. Movies. Movies are so great when you are a kid - they are filled with mystery and excitement and surprise. Then you see enough, begin to recognize the formula and realize they are all the same damn movie.

5. Junkfood. I wish I could go back to the days of eating a bags of Cheetos and banana splits without feeling guilty (and without getting a bellyache). It really sucks that just about the time you're old enough to choose what you want to eat you start becoming health and weight conscious. As Alanis would whine, "Isn't it ironic? Dontcha think?"

6. Cartwheels. Ouch.

7. FM radio. Fuck ClearChannel.

8. In a related vein, U2. Fuck Bono.

In the interests of not sounding incredibly negative, I will present a list of the few things that are better than they used to be:

1. Cell phones. My mom used to haul around a shoebox-sized one with an enormous antenna. We thought she was so cool. Actually calling people involved shouting at the top of her lungs (mostly "What?" and "you're breaking up.") And she never let us use it because it cost about $427 dollars per minute.

2. Sex.

Actually, that's all.

Self-Esteem Bubbles

2005-02-16T06:37:00.000-08:00

I would be very glad to see a shift in the self-esteem craze. A USA Today article talks about how over-emphasis on self-esteem in child-rearing (like excessive praising for mediocre work) has led to a generation of kids and adults with self-worth "bubbles" - excessive but fragile self-regard. Anyone who has ever waited on entitled, I-am-the-center-of-the-universe, demanding customers, or sat in a class at a private university, or endured an hour of the Real World can see that this is a problem. Down with self-esteem! Long live self-doubt!

Marielitos

2005-02-16T05:18:00.000-08:00

This is - gasp - an interesting and newsworthy story from today's Times-Picayune about four Cuban Marielitos released from prison after 25 years.

President Carter decided to get Castro's goat by opening up U.S. borders to anyone who cared to leave Cuba in 1980. This policy came back to bite him in the ass when the clever (and enraged) Castro decided to allow anyone who wanted to go to leave from Cuba's port of Mariel (hence the term "marielito.") Castro also emptied Cuba's prisons and asylums, putting convicts and the mentally ill and retarded on boats bound for Florida (does anyone remember the beginning of Scarface?)

The U.S. Department of Immigration had no idea what to do with the 125,000 who made the trip and really bungled the whole thing. Immigration authorities detained convicts (many who were jailed by Castro for purely political reasons or insignificant infractions) for many years and are just now beginning to release them. With no money or identification. Onto the streets of Louisiana and into many other random communities where they have no friends, family, or other resources. A Cuban lawyer who advocated their release referred to the government's policy as "sabotage," saying, "They lock up these people for so long, then they just dump them on the street. They're going to get arrested and then -- ah, ha! -- these people shouldn't have been released to start off with, they'll say. They're a danger. It's not right." Manny Van Pelt, a spokesman for U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, would seem to agree, "This is a Supreme Court decision," Van Pelt said Tuesday. "It's something we disagreed with. There were individuals who argued for it, and this is the end result. These are criminal aliens being released into the community."

Some New Orleanians are trying to get a charity going to pay for the mens' bus tickets to Miami and other expenses. This is definitely a cause worth supporting and I will try to find out details. In the meantime - please read the story.

Fat Tuesday

2005-02-08T09:17:00.000-08:00

It's here! Yay! Yes, Mardi Gras day would certainly be more fun if I didn't sleep through the last and best parades. Alas, I will end my time in New Orleans without one Zulu coconut. But tonight is my favorite part of Mardi Gras: the after party.

Happily, my exile into Daquiriland is over. I was supposed to work today again but it turns out I was double-booked and instead I'm working a private party on a Bourbon St. balcony tonight. This party gets over at midnight, which is perfect. The best party of the year starts Tuesday at midnight, the official end of Mardi Gras. The wall of horses, followed by the wall of water, washes any tourists off Bourbon St. and all the bars have to close their doors (or get really, really wet). Any decent place closes at midnight and lets its overworked employees off the hook (although more and more places are re-opening around one, a trend which I find greatly disturbing). This is cause for jubilation for the myriad bartenders, waiters, bouncers and others who are subjected to great quantities of massively drunken tourists, greedy managers, long and grueling days, and transportation difficulties that occur when streetcars shut down, cabs are unavailable and parking costs $50.00 a day (and is nearly impossible to reach by car). Plus, it's really fun to watch tourists get run or washed off the street. Quite magical, really.

And then the party is on. All the locals bars on sides streets in the Quarter fill up with elated and bedgraggled workers. Many of the bars don't even allow tourists inside, which is a big draw for servers who would rather bathe in a putrid Bourbon Street "mud" puddle than have to look at another obnoxious bead-wielding tourist again. This is the night when everyone lets down his or her hair and gets crazy. The combination of relief, sleep deprivation and a shared sense of having lived through a major crisis (all of Mardi Gras is a crisis) cause strange behavior in normally sane (well, sane-ish) people. I hazily remember one Mardi Gras morning dancing on a bar with my boss who I normally hated. The memory is burned in my mind because of the huge shiner I got on my eye from the blades of the ceiling fan which hung over the bar. (You should have seen the nasty looks my husband got for a week afterwards. And the shiner looked really cute with my strapless gown I wore to our fancy celebration dinner the next night. But I digress). To sum up, I am very glad to have worked this Mardi Gras. And I am very glad it's nearly over. And I am most glad because I am going to my favorite party of the year tonight: the celebration of the end of the tourist invasion. Happy Mardi Gras.

Daquiri Bars

2005-02-06T08:22:00.000-08:00

Last night I had a chance to experience working in a Bourbon Street daquiri bar during Mardi Gras for the first time. I lived and worked in New Orleans for nearly ten years and almost managed to scrape by without sampling that particular brand of hell, but now that I have graduated from school my job options seem to have shrunk.

A daquiri bar gets the true cream of the crop of Bourbon Street customers: self-impressed fratboys too young to drink, rednecks old and young, "performance artists" (in New Orleans this is code for hustlers) and the ghettoiest of the ghetto. And, as you can well imagine, these fine people not only behave in a dignified and friendly manner, they always remember to tip.

Truly, good daquiri-drinking people, I understand that charging eight dollars for a slushie mixed with rubbing alcohol counts as highway robbery. (Believe it or not, you are not the first person to point this fact out to me today. Or this hour. Possibly this minute). This is not my fault; you can be damn sure that very little of that money trickles down to my little puddle. Look around you: it's Mardi Gras on Bourbon. You should expect to be shaken down as surely as if you were at the airport. And if you think our prices are robbery, you should see what the landlord gets for rent in this part of town.

Bush could be onto something

2005-02-04T11:59:00.000-08:00

Bush's main (and unstated) premise in creating "personal" accounts seems to be that you can't trust your government. He may have a point. Hell, he epitomizes the point.

Kickoff

2005-02-04T03:02:00.000-08:00

Ah, drunk blogging. Why am I awake? Why did I just spell awake "awask"? Mardi Gras is officially here. I think the first real day of Mardi Gras is always Thursday and I am spending my last Mardi Gras Thursday much as I did my first one: unexpectedly drunk (and having lots of fun). We went to a corporate party at the Royal Sonesta hotel and drank free champagne and ate free strawberries, shrimp and filet tips on the balcony on Bourbon Street. I have NO idea what the party was for but they let us in (admission being having to wear a silly nametag on my nice party outfit). And the licquor was free, and I dutifully drank too much of it. (That spelling of "licquor" can't possibly be right. Can it?)

My question is, is it really a bad thing if Mr. Rudolph gets fired from a job that he really, really hates? And knowing that I'm not the most discreet person in the world when intoxicated, isn't it really his fault that I mentioned how unappreciated, underpaid, and, oops, about to move he is? (Did I mention that I imparted this highly privileged information to his boss?) He shouldn't have brought me to his place of work in the first place. Or fed me shots. I really need to perfect this line of thinking quickly. Just in case. But as I tried to 'splain to him, he is either fired from a job he really hates or he's getting a huge promotion. What could be so bad about that? Oh, and now his boss is scared of me. Could that truly be bad?

Either way, my better half has taken his revenge: he fed me Cheetos and Tabasco flavored cheese popcorn (you Louisianans are really taking this Tabasco thing too far) and then put me right to bed. There really is an age cutoff point when you stop being able to digest food like that, particularly right before bed. And now I am awake and paying. But I do love the Thursday before Mardi Gras. After all, should you really begin Mardi Gras weekend without a hangover?

Cuba

2005-01-19T05:59:00.000-08:00

It appears that Cuba is on the Bush administration's short list of countries that are just crying out for invasion. Condoleezza Rice said in her confirmation testimony yesterday, "To be sure, in our world there remain outposts of tyranny, and America stands with oppressed people on every continent, ... in Cuba, and Burma (Myanmar), and North Korea, and Iran, and Belarus, and Zimbabwe."
I'm pretty sure Cubans would rather be oppressed by Castro then "liberated" by Bush, who they universally despise. It's not that all Cubans support Castro and don't chafe under the system, but that they are fiercely independent and nationalistic (as well as more educated about American politics than most Americans). I find Cuba's prominence in this list a little chilling in light of the story I read last week about oil. Someone I know and admire feels that Bush's heightening of the economic embargo this summer was a tactic designed to provoke Castro into doing something that would give the U.S. an excuse to invade Cuba. She thinks Cuba has oil reserves off the coast that Bush and Co. have their greedy little eyes on. To be honest, I didn't give that theory much credence, despite the fact that a) this person is stunningly brilliant and b) she knows a lot more about the situation than I do. The problem is that Cuba's current oil reserves are of a low grade and do not meet the island's needs. However, Fidel Castro announced last week that a vast reserve of high quality oil had been discovered in Cuban water. It's unclear just how big that reserve is, but foreign countries are jumping to invest in Cuban oil. I think this may be a story to watch closely.

Enjoyable Stupidity

2005-01-18T15:58:00.000-08:00

The Boston Globe featured a wide variety of fun stupidity today. They ran a blurb about a Survivor million-dollar winner who, in a regrettable oversight, forgot to mention his prize to the IRS. Oh, and over 300,000 bucks he got from a radio station. Obviously, he was going to mention it - after all, who would be stupid enough to think the IRS wouldn't check a million dollar prize - but it slipped his mind. And in the stupid and greedy category the Globe described how Roger Clemens is seeking a record $22 million in arbitration, never mind that no pitcher has ever earned more than $17.5 million, and that Roger is 157 years old. The writer doesn't come right out and say that Roger is one greedy asshole, but does offer this paragraph for our elucidation:

The $8.5 million spread between his figure and the Astros' was exactly double the previous high in salary arbitration -- the Yankees filed at $14.25 million with Jeter in 2001. The midpoint of $17.75 million is just above the highest listed salary for a pitcher this season -- Randy Johnson's salary with the New York Yankees is calculated at $16.5 million, including a prorated share of the $1 million personal-services contract he agreed to with the Arizona Diamondbacks before he was traded.

Another story explained that sales of androstenedione have skyrocketed because the body building supplement is about to be pulled from the market. Researchers say the drug, which the body converts to testorone, can cause a host of problems including liver damage and increased risk of kidney and heart failure. This reminds me of my old roommate who got a year's supply of Phen-Fen when she found out it could kill her. This gorgeous girl went on to marry an asshole who wouldn't let her get a small shake while he gorged himself on a Rallyburger meal, but that is a different story. The article goes on to say, "Online sales have been equally brisk, fueled in part by warnings from the supplement's retailers. HouseofMuscle.com, founded by Minnesota weight-lifter Joel Sward, urges customers to "buy 12 or 24 bottles" of andro, representing a one- to two-year supply. Otherwise, Sward writes, "you will be forced to break the law and buy them on the black market" when the ban takes effect Thursday." The best quote is at the end when a "nutrition" store owner claims he has found a replacement in the drug Testrol, but worries the FDA will ban it. He says, "Anything that works these days, they seem to keep jamming." Well, duh, I think we have figured out that messing with hormones and causing oneself to grow artificially is a really bad idea. Does it really matter how we go about it? You really do have to wonder which comes first: steroid-induced stupidity or a mindset that makes one think bodybuilding is a worthwhile pursuit.

Mondays

2005-01-17T15:39:00.000-08:00

The world really is going to hell in a handbasket. The social agenda of America is progressing...backward. Our politicians are more corrupt and powerful than ever. The wealth inequality gap is getting bigger and people are getting more ignorant. The Yankees got Randy Johnson. Rudolph just got sexually assaulted by a male dog at the levee. Twice. The only work I can find in New Orleans could be better performed by an easel. Is there any good in the world?

Car Talk

2005-01-12T07:49:00.000-08:00

The good news is that the The Boston Globe ran a fluffy feature on NPR's Car Talk this week. Here's a link for the other Car Talk junkies. One interesting tidbit that I learned is that both brothers graduated from MIT. The bad news is that there is going to be a cartoon based on the show, with Tom and Ray lending their voices and creative input. It would be strange if they started taking themselves seriously after all this time.

Internet Search Terms that Lead to Broccoli: Walmart Strippers

2005-01-07T08:23:00.000-08:00

I pity the poor sod searching desperately through Lisadare Broccoli for "Walmart strippers." Does Walmart offer strippers now? Maybe only at their Canadian outlets. The only other people who find my blog accidentally are looking for a towel-less Nicolette Sheridan. I didn't realize I was running a porn site.

P.S. I feel sorrier still for the people that come to my blog on purpose. They're an even bigger set of goofballs.

P.P.S. Do you think I should oblige the searcher and post a picture of some Walmart strippers? Where might I locate such a thing? Where's a good discount stripper store when you need one? (Besides Chartres St.).

P.P.P.S. Walmart is still evil.

Another reason to eat at Arby's

2005-01-01T09:45:00.000-08:00

I'm enjoying the link Atrios published about percentages of money businesses give to Repblicans and Democrats. Arby's gives 100% to the Dems and they have that delicious Jamocha shake. And don't forget the horseradish sauce for the sandwiches. Heaven. Ooh, and expensive makeup (Estee Lauder, Clinique, MAC, etc.) is a lot bluer than the cheap shit (Covergirl). Does this mean I'm justified in buying $15 lipstick?

Surprisingly to me, gay-friendly (or exploitive, depending on how you see it) network Bravo donates 2/3 of their money to the bad guys. And, Jeff, your Saints are 100% red. (But don't feel so bad. When I figure out how much Home Depot has contributed to Republicans, and figure out how much I have personally contributed to their bottom line, I figure that I personally financed $94.23 of some punk-wh0-is-about-to-vote-against-ethics-monitoring-in-the-House's reelection campaign. But my new blue bedroom looks beautiful).

Walmart and Bush: Has Anyone Ever Seen Them in the Same Room?

2004-12-19T10:31:00.000-08:00

I was just thinking about how Walmart and Bush are exactly alike. Here is a brief list:

1. They're both evil. (Okay, I can be more specific and objective. I just wanted to get that out there).
2. They are much, much more popular in rural areas than cities.
3. They spell trouble for manufacturers.
4. They eschew intellectualism. (Have you ever been to Walmart's book section? Not pretty, my friend. Unless you think of colorbooks, hot rod magazines, and Ann Coulter's latest love letter to liberals as literature.)
5. Pro-gun, anti-sex. Need I say more?
6. They are even bigger monsters overseas.
7. Racist, sexist, xenophobic. On a good day.
8. Squeaky clean, white, Christian images. Corrupt souls.
9. They appeal to lower and middle class Americans by pretending to be plain-talking commonfolk. The only people that benefit are ultra-rich bastards.

Time magazine

2004-12-19T08:26:00.000-08:00

After reading portion of the Time Person of the Year article available online, my guess is pandering with a healthy dose of ass-kissing. And I must reiterate my original sentiment: Fucking brown-nosing bastards. Rudolph agrees.

Time magazine's Person of 2004. (And a warning to skip the boring first paragraph if you're not a friend of mine.)

2004-12-19T07:49:00.000-08:00

Ahhh, the joys of being back online. The computer gave us quite a scare this week when it broke. It didn't screw around, either. I mean it just broke. But my wonderful husband did some research and figured that it was the power supply. He went to Best Buy last night (thank you, late holiday shopping hours) and bought one and installed it and my computer works again. And it didn't lose any software or information (we had no idea if everything, including a massive project I'm working on, would be lost). I woke up today to the irritating, beautiful low whine of my computer. Oh, thank you Jesus. I've been suffering without Internet access. I couldn't read the news, or check the weather, or look up directions or store hours, or search the classifieds for a job, or look at my e-mail or anything that I would normally do with my most beloved modem. It was almost enough to make me get a job.

I was dismayed to learn this morning that Time magazine has named Bush Person of 2004 (didn't they used to call that "Man of the Year?"). (Wow, that was a punctuation minefield. Maybe Daisy would like to help since I'm too lazy to pull out a style manual.) The story is a little bit off, though. Well, the AP story synopsis made it seem weird, at least. Apparently the Time editors awarded the honor to Bush for "reshaping the rules of politics to fit his 10-gallon-hat leadership style." It seems like you could read that line either as Bush is a bold larger-than-life leader or a steamrolling power freak. And this line describing Bush's methods is even more loaded: "for sharpening the debate until the choices bled, for reframing reality to match his design, for gambling his fortunes — and ours — on his faith in the power of leadership." I can't figure out from this blurb whether the article is pandering to the left and right or taking subversive shots, disguised as praise, at Bush. Or maybe it was just written by committee. Either way, I'm intrigued.

David Vitter, a Digression and and Invitation

2004-12-12T18:42:00.000-08:00

Salon ran an interesting piece about Metairie representative David Vitter in October. The article dabbles somewhat irresponsibly in rumors about Vitter's alleged extra-marital affair with a prostitute and a campaign pact with David Duke but the rest is an interesting summary of his career in politics. I have to admit that I know very little about Louisiana politics. I had an extremely embarrassing moment in a job interview in Washington D.C. when the interviewer asked me to name Louisiana's governor. My mind went completely blank and then I blurted out Mike Foster (after the woman had already moved on). Of course, since the interview was this year Foster had long since been replaced by Blanco. This gaffe took place after I had been gushing about my interest in politics and therefore caused me considerable distress. In my defense, it had already been a very long day and interviews make me headachy and nauseous (and dimwitted, apparently). And it's not like I don't have a reasonable knowledge of politics; I imagine not everyone in the country can name the White House communications director or deputy defense secretary off the top of his or her head, but I can because I read the Washington Post and the New York Times religiously. And the Boston Globe (although mostly for sports). But since the New Orleans Times-Picayune is fluffy and the television news is laughable at best and borders on Jerry Springer territory at worst, I rarely bother with it. Maybe now is the time to start. To my friend and very knowledgeable historian, political junkie, and sports-guy Jeff: want to go have a drink or two? My treat.

Rudolph

2004-12-10T19:27:00.000-08:00

Today my dog looked at me with the most touching, emotional expression. He had the look of a man who just found out that his long-lost brother was alive and well. Perhaps the look of a parent seeing his newborn baby for the first time. I was handing him a beef rib bone.

Update: Christmas in Algiers

2004-12-10T08:20:00.000-08:00

One of our neighbors really went nuts. John and I are speculating that it's Blaine Kern, who produces almost all Mardi Gras floats in New Orleans and who does live in this neighborhood. He has a life-size Santa sitting in a sleigh of pelicans and pulled by the reindeer, as well as several elves sitting in his rather small, somewhat enclosed backyard. It's really spectacular. It also seems quite out of place in my dark, lonely, turn-of-the-century neighborhood. The effect is rather eerie (and the weird lighting and unusual colors definitely heighten that impression). I really need to take some pictures. There is an odd, lovely, tropical-looking tree that has dozens of trumpet-shaped flowers that fall toward the ground at one of the houses. The owner decorated it with tiny blue and white lights. When you're from New England, Christmas in Louisiana takes some getting used to. Somehow palm trees adorned with Christmas lights just don't get you into the mood like snow and firs. But like always, New Orleans does have its compensations. And these slightly off Christmas decorations seem beautiful for their own sake (especially since no one here cares about Christmas nearly as much as the real holidays: New Year's Eve and Mardi Gras).

Christmas in Algiers Point

2004-12-08T15:49:00.000-08:00

Anyone who has not been to Algiers Point at night lately should make the trip. The Christmas fever seems to have taken hold of the neighborhood (and it's spreading). A few people went a little crazy and now everyone's getting into the act. Usually when this type of disease, I mean behavior, befalls a neighborhood homeowners use it as an excuse to live out their fantasies of living on the strip in Vegas. In Algiers, however, people seem disinclined to indulge their gaudier instincts. Instead we have a profusion of tasteful Christmasness. People are going a little crazy without the, well, craziness. It's actually rather nice. Oh, and they're filming a movie a block away from me too. From the preponderance of different film crews I have seen in the past few months I think my the Point is going to be in every movie that comes out next year. So check it out before we put up a big gate around the neighborhood to keep riff-raff like you out.

As an added bonus, whatever band has been playing at the Old Point bar the last few Sunday afternoons is phenomenal. The strains I hear from the levee when I take the monsters for a walk in this sleepy neighborhood suggest New Orleans jazz 80 years ago. Definitely worth a look.

Things I Will Miss About New Orleans...(cont.)

2004-12-07T14:58:00.000-08:00

Fourth-grader suspended over suspected 'Jell-O shots'
By Doug Simpson, Associated Press December 7, 2004
NEW ORLEANS -- An 8-year-old girl was suspended for nine days for bringing to school what appeared to be about 30 "Jell-O shots" -- though it was unclear whether they contained alcohol.

Man, people are so uptight around here. Apparently the girl's mother makes them for her work in a bar and instructed her to sell them three for a dollar for "Christmas money."

By the way, honey, I just drank the last beer.

2004-12-06T18:05:00.000-08:00

Binge

2004-12-06T17:38:00.000-08:00

Dude, I'm, like, totally bingeing (SP?) on the junk food. I had a hot dog and it went straight to my head. I'm now awaiting my (well, really my husband's) totally greasy, pepperoni-topped frozen pizza. Send help.

Did I mention that I'm defrosting hamburger?

Union Carbide

2004-12-06T17:20:00.000-08:00

BBC admits Dow 'interview' was a hoax
Man posing as spokesman said firm accepted Bhopal responsibility

Updated: 1:02 p.m. ET Dec. 3, 2004
LONDON - BBC World said on Friday that an interview it ran with a man it identified as a spokesman for Dow Chemical Co, in which he said the U.S. company accepted responsibility for India's Bhopal disaster, was wrong and part of an "elaborate deception".

The story is kind of amazing. The hoax is truer than the reality, which is that Union Carbide (later purchased by Dow) never admitted their responsibility for the tragic accident and always maintained that a rogue employee purposely caused it. They settled for about half a billion dollars with the community but never bothered to spend the thirty million needed to clean up the plant, which is still leaching dangerous chemicals and causing disease and birth defects.

Christmas in Iraq

2004-12-06T16:19:00.000-08:00

I'm trying to figure out what kinds of gifts to send to my friend Racheal who has been deployed to Iraq as an Army National Guard reservist. The Internet is no help - I'm finding sites like "Christian and Patriotic Gifts & Chocolates." I've been wandering through serious Republican country for about 15 minutes now. I already spent 50 hours in west Michigan last week. Enough is enough. So does anyone have any gift ideas for a 23-year-old girl-who-should-never-have-been-deployed-in-the-first-place? She is a serious girly-girl and an incredible athlete. She hates walking and reading and loves strip clubs. The only suggestion she had was "junkfoodyummy." She hasn't slept in a month (which explains the lack of grammar-type substance in her e-mails) but expects to have a lot more time on her hands soon. Seriously, if anyone has any good ideas I would greatly appreciate the input. The only ones I can think of are lip balm, magazines and microwave popcorn, and maybe a plush pillow if the shipping doesn't break me. Maybe some liquor as well. Does anyone know if there are rules about that? Thanks for the help.

Strippers

2004-12-05T17:58:00.000-08:00

Canada Invites Strippers and Gets Scrutiny
Scandal Renews Debate on Program to Import 'Exotic Dancers'

By Doug StruckWashington Post Foreign ServiceSunday, December 5, 2004; Page A12

TORONTO -- Coiled around a brass pole on a barroom stage, clad only in towering stiletto heels, a 31-year-old Romanian woman named Veronica is helping to fill what has suddenly become Canada's most talked-about shortage: a scarcity of strippers.

A government program to import hundreds of "exotic dancers," which was already controversial, took center stage recently when Canada's immigration minister, Judy Sgro, was found to have given preferential visa treatment to a nude dancer who did volunteer work in her reelection campaign for Parliament.

Critics say the program turns Canada into a pimp, while local employers assert it serves a legitimate business, and dancers from struggling countries say it's a way to better their lives.

Reasons Why I Prefer Being a Golden Retriever Puppy to Being Human: (A post by the real Rudolph, who is mad I've been using his name)

2004-12-01T08:59:00.000-08:00

1. People give me lots and lots of attention just for being excessively cute. I am a beautiful blond. How 'bout you? Didn't think so.
2. I con people into giving me extra food all day long (see above reason).
3. I feel no pain. Not even when I am dropped on my head. Particularly when I am dropped on my head.
4. I do not over-analyze anything. I do not suffer from self-doubts, guilt or low self-esteem.
5. I do not worry about "getting chunky." People think I'm even cuter when fat.
6. I always think something fabulous is About To Happen!! Weee!
7. I think rolling around on my back is really quite entertaining. You should try it sometime.
8. I'm not suffering from post-election depression.

Trivial downside:

1. I'm not old enough to buy beer.
2. When I get lonely and sing the blues as an expression of my serious grief and existential angst, people think that it's funny. Folks, it's NOT funny! Really! Stop laughing.

Fine.

2004-11-30T17:58:00.000-08:00

Ooh, now I'm a big girl. Just got Sitemeter. I think.

Safe

2004-11-30T14:18:00.000-08:00

Well, I made it through two and a half days in west Michigan. I would like to say more but Daisy's discovery has me paranoid.

Speaking of Daisy, you would appreciate my menu for the week. I just made some delicious fresh salsa for black bean quesadillas, and am planning homemade butternut squash ravioli, truffle risotto, homemade pizza with whole milk mozzarella, and whole roast chicken for the rest of the week. I probably lost you on the chicken, huh? But so yummy.

Things I Will Miss about New Orleans When I Leave on My Quest for Non-Easel-Related Employment and Health Food:

2004-11-24T13:07:00.000-08:00

1. "Scarless breast augmentation" billboards
2. Comically dirty, over-the-top politics that make no pretense of politeness or restraint
3. The social acceptability of being really drunk during daylight hours
4. Roast beef sandwiches dripping with gravy and mayonnaise
5. Fried oyster po-boys. Hell, fried anything sandwiches. Not so big in the Northeast.
6. "I can have a coke?" "What time it is?"
7. Girls from Chalmette
8. Seeing sunrise from a bar. Deciding you might as well stay out longer since it's already morning.
9. Rodents of Unusual Size

Part 2 of Our Career Advice Section: Jobs That You Can't Get with a Four-Year Degree from a Private University:

2004-11-23T16:08:00.000-08:00

1. Entry-level secretary (underqualified - despite having years of experience)
2. Receptionist (overqualified - despite begging)
3. Part-time errand-runner (underqualified)
4. Customer service representative (poor customer service skills and lousy attitude. Probably not the employer's, the economy's, or even W's fault).
5. Administrative assistant (underqualified)
6. Office manager (overqualified. Don't ask.)
7. Public relations or communications assistant (God forbid the city I live in should have jobs I actually want)
8. Clerk (who knows)

For more upbeat news, please see: Jobs You Can Get with a B.A. from a Private University (earlier post):

Never mind.

2004-11-23T15:50:00.000-08:00

Just in Case Anyone Actually Reads This Nonsense...

2004-11-22T18:09:00.000-08:00

I'm putting in a plug for Daisy's new blog, sadly to replace her old blog. Daisy is a New Orleans librarian (meaning she always have fabulous stories to tell and a very interesting point of view). (And better grammar than I do). Check out her candid and funny reviews of books, websites and music on I Have a Phoenix.

Colin Powell

2004-11-20T14:41:00.000-08:00

I don't know why I keep making excuses for this guy.

On Wednesday, Secretary of State Colin L. Powell said Iran was trying to
modify its missiles to carry a nuclear warhead, and was working on weapon
designs that would fit those missiles. He has stood by those comments
despite indications elsewhere in the administration that the intelligence
had not been corroborated.

I defer to Jeff's opinion.

John: I'm not crazy

2004-11-19T13:31:00.000-08:00

Wonderful Bush tax policy (otherwise known as "The Rich Pay Nothing and Fuck Everyone Else")...

Washington Post: The changes are meant to be revenue-neutral. To pay for them, the administration is considering eliminating the deduction of state and local taxes on federal income tax returns and scrapping the business tax deduction for employer-provided health insurance, the advisers said.

The Incredibles

2004-11-19T09:51:00.000-08:00

Boring, boring boring.

Daisy will appreciate this post

2004-11-18T09:36:00.000-08:00

I experienced a rather troubled sleep last night. I was repeatedly awoken by horrific strains of dog gas. Apparently the six kernels of popcorn I fed Rudolph the night before caught up with him. The miserable night of sleep I had rivalled that of the so-called "hell week" I experienced as a Tulane freshman. Hell week was the not-so-original invention of fraternities that required their lackey bitches, I mean pledges, to set off fire alarms at a different time every night in my dorm. Unfortunately for us, the only thing that Tulane ever updated in that decrepit building was - you guessed it - the fire alarms. They installed those ones that flash electric strobe lights and earsplitting buzzes that abruptly wake you up from a sound slumber, and then demand in a creepy robot's voice that you "REMAIN CALM!!!" By the fifth night I was sleeping through them. But nobody, I mean nobody, could sleep through the overwhelming dog-gas that shattered my pleasant slumber last night.

Desperate Prudes

2004-11-17T07:23:00.000-08:00

This from the front page of the Washington Post:
After receiving complaints from viewers and the NFL, ABC Sports apologized yesterday for airing a sexually suggestive segment using Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Terrell Owens and several stars of "Desperate Housewives" to introduce its "Monday Night Football" game between the Dallas Cowboys and the Eagles.
"It was the most disgraceful thing I've ever seen," Pittsburgh Steelers owner Dan Rooney said in a telephone interview yesterday. "It's on at 9 o'clock. Kids are watching, and everyone starts to think this is the NFL. I've written a letter to the commissioner [Paul Tagliabue], and I don't think he can be very happy about it, either. We can't allow that kind of thing to happen." ...
The segment opened with actress Nicollette Sheridan, clad in only a towel, standing near Owens in the Eagles' locker room. On ABC's new hit series, Sheridan plays a character named Edie Britt, a multiple divorcee who has had a number of sexual conquests in her fictional neighborhood.
Sheridan: "My house burned down and I need to take a long, hot shower. . . . So where are you off to looking so pretty?"
Owens: "Baby, it's 'Monday Night Football.' Game starts in 10 minutes."
Sheridan: "Oh, you and your little games. . . . I've got a game we can play."
Later, with her back to the camera, Sheridan dropped the towel and Owens said, "Aw, hell, the team's going to have to win one without me."

This is such a ridiculous non-story. The NFL is not about sex (not to mention graphic violence)? Have they seen their commercials? I wonder what people are more worried about: the fact that Nicollette Sheridan is naked, or the fact that she is white and Owens is (whisper) black. Either way, this was the leadoff story on some local New Orleans news show last night ("If you were offended by last night's opening of the NFL, you were in good company") and on the front page of the Post today. Somebody please tell me why.

Where are all the conservatives?

2004-11-16T19:28:00.000-08:00

WASHINGTON -- The government will carry out another accounting maneuver to avoid breaching the $7.4 trillion ceiling on the national debt, Treasury Secretary John Snow said Tuesday.
The step marks the latest move by Treasury to free up billions of dollars -- on paper -- so the government can keep paying its bills. Treasury is doing this because it is running out of room in its statutory authority to borrow.

The Animals Are Going Crazy

2004-11-15T16:41:00.000-08:00

Beavers make dam out of stolen money
November 15, 2004
GREENSBURG, La. -- Beavers found a bag of bills stolen from a casino, tore it open and wove the money into the sticks and brush of their dam on a creek near Baton Rouge.

This can't be a coincidence, can it?

2004-11-15T16:32:00.000-08:00

From Reuters, via the Boston Globe
LIMA, Peru -- Peruvian police said Monday they seized nearly 1,540 pounds of cocaine hidden in frozen giant squid bound for Mexico and the United States.
The drugs were covered in pepper to divert sniffer dogs and sealed in several layers of plastic and other wrappers. Police had been on the trail since August.
Seven people were arrested in the drug seizure. Police said the haul would have a street value of about $17.5 million.
Peru is the world's No. 2 cocaine producer after Colombia, and many of its drugs end up on U.S. streets after being sent via Mexico.

More Draft and Some Sinning (skip to the bottom for the sinning part)

2004-11-15T09:36:00.000-08:00

A very frightening story in the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette about the kind of people the army is calling up (courtesy of Kos). I don't see any way that this does not qualify as a draft.

GREENVILLE, Pa. -- Three years after he was honorably discharged from the Army, Frederick Pistorius was surprised to learn he was a deserter.
But there it was, on his doorstep: a letter from Barry W. Kimmons, Deputy Chief, Deserter Information Point Extension Office of the Army Reserve Personnel Command.
"On 12 July 2004 you were involuntarily mobilized to active duty in the United States Army," the letter says. "To date you have not reported to your mobilization station as required by your orders." Possibly Pistorius had not responded for two reasons. The Pistorius family had moved from the address in Sharon, Pa., to which the Army had sent its first letter. More saliently, having served honorably in not one but two branches of the U.S. military, with no additional obligation showing on his discharge papers, Pistorius would have had no reason to think he was subject to anything but his civilian job at a local steel plant...

Equally implausible were the men who turned up at Camp McGrady last month.
When I first spoke to Pistorius, by telephone from the camp, he said nobody had been given a physical. He told his Army commanders that he had a permanent back injury from a car crash. They were unimpressed by a letter from his chiropractor. His pre-deployment health assessment lists him in this word: "Deployable."
Pistorius spoke with his captain.
"He said everybody here's going to Iraq," Pistorius said. "It's unbelievable some of the guys they're bringing down there."
One man arrived with a hospital identification band still on his wrist. He'd just had knee surgery. One 48-year-old from Alabama had a hip replacement and fused vertebrae in his back.
"He showed them the documents, but they still made him come down to be examined by their doctors," Pistorius said. Pistorius spoke of a man called back from upstate New York.
"He had no teeth and he had arthritis in his leg," he said.

On a personal note, this is the scariest story I have read to date. My husband has Individual Ready Reserve status for a while longer. He assures me that they never call those people and that even if they do he's part of the navy and they're not going to Iraq. Besides, his skills are too valuable and his electronics and loading training were too expensive to teach. My feeling on the matter is that when push comes to shove the military will use anyone as "cannon-fodder" (my mom's endearing name for infantry).

Maybe the war-mongering red state religious types are onto something here: I've never had such good reason to pray. My wonderful friend Racheal just got to Iraq (sent there as part of the Army National Guard reserves). My fervent hope that she come home unharmed after her year, and does not get re-deployed or have her time extended borders on prayer. And when I think about the possibility of my husband...but I would prefer not to articulate that one. I can tell you that some non-rational voice emanating from somewhere deep in my gut (and not my head) prays to someone.

On a lighter note, our traditional Thanksgiving jaunt to Grand Rapids, Michigan should provide plenty of time to spend in church getting acquainted with my personal savior. Last year we had to go to services three times. In five days. And when we were there in August the minister started his, um, whatever the Protestant version of, oh hell, I can't remember the word. The part where they get to give their opinion of shit. He started that off with this profound, original and tasteful comment: "The Bible doesn't mention Adam and Steve, only Adam and Eve." I don't kid. And then continued his sermon (hey, that's the word!) by preaching that one candidate (clearly a dirty word) for President supported gay marriage. And he didn't want to preach from the pulpit and all, but...
I couldn't tell you much more about his lovely teachings 'cause I left and didn't come back until the service ended. John's family very wisely never mentioned it. John long ago taught them that they shouldn't ask a question if they don't want to know the answer. (How they found that out is really funny, but I better not mention it).
So all you people staying here to gorge yourselves on yummy food, gamble at the racetrack on opening day, drink, party and whatever other kind of sinning you will by enjoying, please remember that you're going to hell sooner. I will be there as soon as I can.

Sinister

2004-11-14T19:00:00.000-08:00

Interesting story from the New York Times about Walmart's information gathering.

Scary:
By its own count, Wal-Mart has 460 terabytes of data stored on Teradata mainframes, made by NCR, at its Bentonville headquarters. To put that in perspective, the Internet has less than half as much data, according to experts.

Scarier:
"They can find out your mortgage amounts, your court dates, your driving record, your creditworthiness."

Scariest:
By next October, the company will require its biggest suppliers to tag shipments to some of its distribution centers with tiny transmitters that would eventually let Wal-Mart track every item that it sells.

The worst thing is that the Walmart people are using this data to further squeeze their suppliers. They are trying to effect a system in which the manufacturer owns a product until the point of sale. And gets stuck with all the excess and liability.

"You're not living up to your potential."

2004-11-13T15:59:00.000-08:00

Child beaten for 'B' in conduct
Her father is booked with cruelty to juvenile

A Meraux man was arrested after authorities said he beat his 4-year-old daughter with her belt, injuring her hip with the buckle, after learning she had gotten the equivalent of a B in conduct in her prekindergarten class on Wednesday.

Jobs You Can Get with a Four Year Degree from a Private University...

2004-11-09T13:36:00.000-08:00

1. Data entry
2. Greeter
3. Sign-in sheet coordinator
4. Easel ("Upscale hotel chain seeks easel. Professional appearance and Bachelor's degree required for this challenging entry-level position holding a sign. Will train right candidate.")

Framing

2004-11-08T09:13:00.000-08:00

Whoever coined the phrase "backdoor draft" is a genius.

Bring on the Draft

2004-11-07T06:26:00.000-08:00

This AP story should help me fulfill my nightmare quota for the week. John has Inactive Ready Reserve (IRR) status for about 150 years. But he keeps reassuring me that it's a last resort taken just before the draft. I hope everyone else is as reassured as I am. Sleep well.

HONOLULU - A veteran of the first Persian Gulf War (news - web sites) is suing the Army after it ordered him to report for duty 13 years after he was honorably discharged from active duty and eight years after he left the reserves...

The Army announced last year that it would involuntarily activate an estimated 5,600 soldiers to serve in Iraq, Afghanistan (news - web sites) and elsewhere. Army officials would be tapping members of the Individual Ready Reserve — military members who have been discharged from the Army, Army Reserve or the Army National Guard, but still have contractual obligations to the military.

Tulane

2004-11-05T18:09:00.000-08:00

I called Tulane today to find out why I still haven't received my diploma. I started at the logical place, the dean's office. They directed me to Academic Affairs. I repeated my question, and they sent me to the registrar's office. They kindly transferred me to...well, I lost count after five transfers or so. But the upshot of this whole affair was that I ended up at - you guessed it - the dean's office. Tulane is a fun, well-run school.

Talk about Setting the Bar Low

2004-11-04T08:50:00.000-08:00

Iraqis Challenge Bush to Do Better Than Saddam
Thu Nov 4, 6:38 AM ET

By Lin Noueihed
BAGHDAD (Reuters) - Iraqis challenged re-elected President Bush (news - web sites) on Thursday to bring them the elusive new dawn he promised when U.S. forces deposed Saddam Hussein.

"Bush talks about freedom and democracy but all the Americans have brought is death and destruction."

Eureka!

2004-11-04T08:36:00.000-08:00

Is it possible that William Safire could actually cheer me up? His article "The Dangers of Lopsidedness" did just that. Sure, it was full of backhanded compliments to liberals, but it also reminded one that politics is a cyclical thing and that, in the words of former Speaker Sam Rayburn, "When you get too big a majority you're immediately in trouble." Safire even took it upon himself to warn that Bush that, "The atrophy of the usual checks and balances requires a certain internal restraint" and advises him to nominate for Justice a moderate, strict-Constructionist. Oh, and one who also happens to be brilliant, female, Hispanic...and from Massachusetts. Okay, that's a little weird. Maybe it's some kind of code? I'm onto him! William Safire is an enemy spy! Not an enemy mean conservative! I think I like him better now! (See, aren't you a little cheered up too?)

Self-Indulgent Rambling

2004-11-03T17:50:00.000-08:00

Tomorrow will be a better day than this one. Can't be any worse. And tomorrow I find out if I will be spending another year (at least) in this great state that led the way on banning the gays from enjoying normal legal protections. By a huge margin (but thank God for the courts). Southern Decadence should boycott us next year and head to Massachusetts or California. Yes, I'm aware that those places are not one tenth the fun of New Orleans. And they don't desperately need tourism dollars the way we do. Whatever.

But when I'm not driving or attempting to buy something, or, God forbid, trying to order french fries at McDonald's of all places, I really do love this crazy city. A week in Washington D.C. reminded me of that. Sure, the folks in Washington are sane and thoughtful and socially progressive (I'm talking about the people, not the politicians, folks). And they are even a bit less homicidally rude than the people here. But they are also incredibly boring. The city has no pulse, especially at night. No rowdiness, no character, no grit. And most importantly, no dive bars. Can I really make a place where people feel the need to wear ties to bars my home? Maybe I could have before I lived here.

Great things about D.C.: The jobs. I applied for two jobs. One of them working as PAC coordinator and admin assist to the VP in charge of governmental affairs at a lovely office located exactly one block from the White House. The other job involved working for a bi-partisan lobbying firm that deals a lot with trade issues and represents some Latin American countries. It couldn't be more up my alley.
Other jobs I may be qualified for: editorial assistant at the liberal American Prospect magazine. Administrative coordinator for the Caribbean and Central America Association, a trade group that promotes economic justice. Junior account executive at a small PR firm that deals only with socially progressive issues and represents organizations like Planned Parenthood. These jobs are almost too good to be true. Can it really be worth it to move to a place with no heart and 600-square-feet houses that start at $300,000? Just to have a shot at the most gratifying and stimulating jobs in the universe? (This looks better on paper, but feels impossible after spending a miserable and lonely week in the city).

As luck would have it, I don't need to make that decision right this second. I have stumbled upon an actual interesting and cool job right here in Slackerville. Sure, it doesn't pay worth shit, and offers no benefits...but it's nice being happy. Right?

The Numbers Say It All

2004-11-03T07:09:00.000-08:00

Halliburton stock: Up
Phizer stock: Up
Defense stock: Up
Oil stock: Up
Diebold stock: Up

why?

2004-11-03T06:03:00.000-08:00

Is it really true? Could this really be what people want? More deficit, more weak economy, more injustice? More lying and scolding from the President? And don't even get me started at how disappointed I am that the bigots in so many states banned not just gay marriage but civil unions and domestic partner benefits. Do they know that these laws are going to be as notorious for their cruelty and wrongness as the Jim Crow laws are now? Well maybe not quite, but they are certainly in that vein.

I really went to bed last night thinking that the last four years would be swept aside like a bad dream. Now all I have are pitiful rays of waning hope, the certainty that the networks will dismiss and humiliate Kerry as a sore loser, lingering and unverifiable doubts about the veracity of the touch screen votes Florida, and four more years of Voldemort, I mean...well, you know who I mean. The nightmare continues...

Nation

2004-10-31T10:35:00.000-08:00

Well, it really happened. Without me. The bums. Boston did not even burn to the ground. The whole thing was "profoundly anticlimactic" (in the words of one Boston sportswriter). It's the only story here, though. People are walking around dazed and euphoric. No one knows what to expect next season and everyone has tons of questions: Will we lose interest or identity? Where is the drama? How much joy can we wring out of pouring salt on the Yankees fans' wounds? Are we now the nation's baseball team? (We'll know the answer to that question when kids in New Orleans ghettos start sporting Red Sox gear instead of Yankees caps). Why were the Saint Louis fans so gracious, anyway? Did Schilling really endorse Bush for prez? What's going to happen to Pedro after this season? Are the owners going to start cutting back on the payroll now that we aren't battling the curse? Is Theo Epstein single? Lots of questions. The most important one has already been answered, however. Boston fans are really wondering if next year's season is going to be as interesting and tense as this one's. By a simple twist of fate, the Sox are scheduled to play their first game next season (when they unfurl the World Champions flag) against the Yankees. At Fenway Park. Can anyone wait?

Babies

2004-10-22T15:14:00.000-07:00

Funniest thing my sister shouted at me from Landsdowne St. by phone after the Sox won game 7: A-ROD EATS BABIES! WOOOO!

Does anyone know that I have two interview this week? Does anyone care? Hell, do I? I'm going to Boston. I'm gonna be there when we win. Take that, whispering curse-worriers! When!

I can sleep now...except that I have insomnia

2004-10-21T05:11:00.000-07:00

I don't even know what to say. The sports writers have the silly and futile job of trying to catch the incredible joy and wonder that grips Red Sox fans right now. I certainly don't know how to express my absurd excitement. A chance to see them go to the World Series only comes around once in a generation. My turn! Let's hope this team has anything left to win with. The American League may never win another championship again if the Sox and Yankees keep playing each other.

I'm being a completely irresponsible adult and blowing off my job to go to Boston. Anyone coming?

Bring Out the Gimp!

2004-10-19T22:01:00.000-07:00

There you go, evil Yankees: beaten by a bloody gimp! Hah! Of course, this series had to go 7 games so the Red Sox could properly break our hearts at the bitter end. Like always. But, wow, what a run.

In related news, I got a response on one of my resumes today! A real, interesting, worthwhile job! Not data entry!

Dirty Partisan Politics in Florida

2004-10-17T09:21:00.001-07:00

This story truly alarms and offends me:

Presidential Elections - AP

Report: Jeb Bush Ignored Felon List Advice
1 hour, 48 minutes ago
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. - Florida Gov. Jeb Bush ignored advice to throw out a flawed felon voter list before it went out to county election offices despite warnings from state officials, according to a published report Saturday.

In a May 4 e-mail obtained by the Sarasota Herald-Tribune, Florida Department of Law Enforcement computer expert Jeff Long told his boss that a Department of State computer expert had told him "that yesterday they recommended to the Gov that they 'pull the plug'" on the voter database.
The e-mail said state election officials "weren't comfortable with the felon matching program they've got," but added, "The Gov rejected their suggestion to pull the plug, so they're 'going live' with it this weekend."

This is the list that wrongfully excluded so many African American voters (heavily Democrat) in the 2000 election. The reason? Their last names or social security numbers were similar to convicted criminals. One of the legacies of slavery is that so many African Americans have the same last name. Because of what Republican election officials refer to as a "technical error," very few Hispanics (80% Republican in Florida and 20% of the population) who were supposed to be on the list made it.

This is really scary. This dirty tactic is even creepier than stopping the recount.

The BFG

2004-10-16T17:07:00.000-07:00

A comment just prompted me to write about my favorite book right now, Roald Dahl's The BFG. My husband and I just rediscovered this darkly whimsical children's classic and have been cracking up over it ever since. The silly language and the chapter about "whizzpoppers" and the Queen of England make our juvenile hearts excessively happy. As do the names of the bigger, unfriendly giants: Fleshlumpeater, Bonecruncher, Manhugger, Bloodbottler, Maidmasher, Gizzardguzzler, etc. Dahl delights in the macabre and his joyful, twisted names for the giants reflects it.

Anyone who has not read this delightful tale must run to the bookstore (or the children's section of the library) and buy it RIGHT NOW! Really, in this dark age of Yankee dominance and political malevolence, you need something clean, fun and brutal to clear your soul.

Pimping Martha Stewart: This post is not as provocative as it sounds. And has not been edited for brevity. Or content. Or style.

2004-10-16T08:02:00.000-07:00

So I did something really educational last night: I watched a television news show. Now, I'm not saying educational in the sense of learning important or worthwhile facts about politics or life. Instead, this was more of a "seeing how the other half lives" kind of experience.

I'm here to report that it's not pretty. I watched Anderson Cooper 360, mostly because I think he's kind of cute, in a preppy, prematurely greying kind of way. And he seems like a pretty nice guy, which definitely gives him an edge over the Bill O'Reillys and Daryn Kagens of the world. Or not. Because aside from the niceness and cuteness, this show had very little going for it in terms of reality and originality. No wonder the Daily Show viewers do better than TV news watchers on current events quizzes.

The show featured and expert on low security prisons and offered important insight into Martha Stewart's first day in jail. After Cooper read from her online letter. Apparently Martha Stewart is bravely continuing her heroic journey of. . .self-promotion. Anyway, this expert turned out to be Heidi Fleiss, although it took me a few minutes to register that fact because I was trying to figure out why only parts of her face moved. Was she paralyzed? Maybe part of her face was melting? Made of wood? Ahh, but at last I figured out that the woman was in her final stages of Botox disease. I've really never seen anything like it. Martha Stewart, I hope you're watching. Instead of asking Nelson Mandela what you're going through in prison, they dragged out a wood-faced, scarier-than-Joan or Melissa Rivers ex-pimp. And with no hint of irony whatsoever.

360 also featured an excruciatingly long interview with the lawyer/gangster representing Bill O'Reilly's phone sex accuser. It revealed . . .absolutely nothing. And lasted about 15 minutes. And was followed by a brief but loud screaming match between two uninvolved lawyers discussing the merits of the case. About which they knew nothing. Mmm, fun and enlightening.

After discussing the Kerry/Mary Cheney incident for about half the show, and featuring numerous clips and pointless interviews , Cooper concluded his show by awarding Lynne Cheney the "overkill of the week" award. Really.

Proof for John

2004-10-14T06:19:00.000-07:00

Found on CareerBuilder, cited by Talking Points Memo blog:

DESCRIPTION
$8.50/hr part-time,$10.00/hr full-timeCanvassing Neighborhoods in Support of the GOP!Voter's Outreach of America is hiring door-to-door canvassers asking people to register to vote. Must be at least 18 yrs of age, no felonies, registered to vote and have own transportation. Need good communication skills and professional appearance. Hours are 4pm to 8pm Monday-Friday and 8am to noon Saturday. Call toll free 702-307-1320 for more information.Paid for by the Republican National Committee. http://www.gop.com/. Not authorized by any candidate or candidate's committee.Source - Reno Gazette Journal - Reno, NV

Disaster

2004-10-13T14:58:00.000-07:00

Well, here I am patiently awaiting another Red Sox debacle. Actually, I don't really think that's true, but how often do you get to impress non-existent blog readers with a fancy word like "debacle"? Last night's game wasn't a fiasco, Red Sox style. Really, it was just a baseball game. There were no horrifying bloopers or evil portents of doom to come. Mike Mussina pitched a hell of a game, the Sox didn't make any embarrassing or fluky errors (well, maybe Manny's miss that allowed three runs in, but we expect that from him), and they stayed in the game even after being down a hellish 8-0. Jeff and I thought Bill Mueller was about to tie the game in the ninth, but his failure to do so wasn't because he made a miserable or preventable error. My point is, the Yankees won, clean and simple. Tonight, the Red Sox probably will. I'm not sweating. Not a bit.

In other news, the presidential campaigners are "debating" tonight. Since King Kaufman didn't print my e-mail about the playoff/scheduling conflict, I will re-create it here for you, both of my faithful blog readers. Even though one of you has already seen it. Enjoy.

Dear Mr. Kaufman,

Your boss asked the question, "Don't you think it's lame that baseball couldn't schedule the playoff games around the presidential debates?" The more appropriate question should be, "Isn't it lame that the campaigns couldn't schedule presidential debates around baseball playoff games?" The campaigns chose a Friday night during playoff season for the least structured of the three debates and the only one that comes close to living up to the name. Clearly they were not concerned about people having to choose between this debate and entertainment. If they were, they would have chosen to air all the debates in the middle of the week when people are home to watch. Every network knows that weekend nights are the kiss of death for programming because nine-to-fivers have other plans on weekends, such as leaving the house. If both campaigns truly wanted everyone to see the debates they would have scheduled them for weeknights. And allowed them the opporunity to actually be interesting and informative.

The fact that the campaigns scheduled the town hall debate on a Friday night when playoff games had long been scheduled suggests that they cared little about this kind of conflict, or worse, wished for it. And if the latter is true, they would have found some other difficult time to schedule them. Also, tightly scheduled baseball games in the postseason cannot just be moved around. The timing of games affects crucial factors such as how much rest pitchers get. If Johan Santana had had another day of rest, the Twins might very well have won game 4 and we might be looking at a very different ALCS.

However, in the interest of full disclosure I should mention that I'm a Red Sox fan.

Sincerely,

Lisa Dare

Red Sox: junk food and living wills

2004-10-12T15:15:00.000-07:00

Ahh, tonight is the game I have been waiting for all year. My heart is fluttering. This week is baseball season. I have everything I need to psychologically prepare for this series:

1. Junk food. This week I am officially on hiatus from vegetables, whole grain and yogurt. In their place I have appropriate game-viewing food: jalapeno poppers (don't make me look up the tilde for the "n" in jalapeno), Wings of Fire, corndogs and pepperoni pizza. For variety, I have bourbon-laced brownies and coffee ice cream. Expected weight gain: 5 pounds.
2. A case of beer. Self-explanatory. Expected weight gain: 9 pounds.
3. Radiant Hope and Optimism that will wither at the first ominous sign.
4. A living will in case my suicide attempt or heart attack at the end of the series leaves me comatose. (Good thing nobody reads this blog, or that comment would be in poor taste). Expected weight loss due to illness: 5 pounds.
5. A vocabulary stocked with the most vulgar epithets, swears and curses that I stockpile for use during Red Sox/Yankees games. Expected weight loss due to swearing: none (silly, who ever heard of losing weight because of swearing? I would like to have the patent on that diet!)
6. 86 years worth of superstition and dread. Expected weight loss due to excessive sweating: 8 pounds.

I'm ready. Bring it on, baseball gods.

(Net weight gain: 1 pound)

One for the "I swear I'm not making this up" category

2004-10-10T17:09:00.000-07:00

I heard a story on the radio today about a parasite that attaches itself to a snapper's tongue and eats it. Worse, the parasite turns itself around and becomes the fish's tongue. Ewww.

The truly weird part about this story is that I heard it on NPR's This American Life. Ira Glass was interviewing author Carl Zimmer about his new book Parasite Rex: Inside the Bizarre World of Nature's Most Dangerous Creatures. Actually, it sounds pretty interesting. What a weird forum for that type of book, however.

Hey, does this parasite/fish thing suggest to anyone a weird conservative/media analogy?

Near Miss

2004-10-10T11:57:00.000-07:00

Yesterday the real Rudolph and I had an actual brush with death while driving to a dog's birthday party in Mississippi. Actually you could call it a "near Miss." (hee, hee, that one's for you, Jeff). There are two important questions people have been asking me about my little hydroplaning adventure:

a: What were you thinking, driving 70 miles per hour in the rain with bald tires on crappy Louisiana highways? (The obvious answer to that question is, "everyone else was doing it.")
And, more importantly, b: A DOG'S birthday party?

I am happy to report that I escaped unharmed. And without the religious conversion that might have accompanied the incredible luck I had in surviving, without a scratch, an out-of-control hydroplane that whipped my car around twice (I think) through two or three lanes of 70 MPH traffic, across the median, nearly into oncoming traffic from the other side of the highway, stopping in time to land perfectly on the left shoulder facing the right direction to go home. Not to mention the incredible luck of finding a perfect excuse to avoid going to a dog's birthday party.

Conspiracy

2004-10-08T22:51:00.000-07:00

Okay, I thought the rumors about Bush's jacket "bulge" in the first debate were silly conspirary theory, or worse, a tool of distraction from actual issues (actually, that's still a distinct possibility). Until this article from the front page of the New York Times gave me pause:

First they ["White House and campaign officials"] said that pictures
showing the bulge might have been doctored. But then, when the bulge turned out
to be clearly visible in the television footage of the evening, they offered a
different explanation.
"There was nothing under his suit jacket," said Nicolle Devenish, the Bush campaign's communications director. "It was most likely a rumpling of that portion of his suit jacket, or a wrinkle in the fabric."
Umm, how weird is it that:
a. they tried to say the photo was doctored
b. the communication peopple had no plausible explanation whatsoever - the pictures clearly do not show a rumple, but something with a definite form underneath the jacket (see Salon.com for a clear picture)

Whatever, like the questionable authenticity Bush's National Guard papers, this could only prove what we already know to be true: that Bush's brain is full of mush and dead flies and someone else pulls the strings. It's funny, isn't it, that Laura's the one who acts and dresses like a Stepford wife (although not the sexier, updated version)? She outbrains and outclasses Bush and is capable of stringing together coherent sentences. I still hate her.

For the record, I don't think this story is going anywhere (although I am encouraged by the cautious Times picking it up at all).

For the record, also, I really thought the ALDS series was going to go five games. Even after the Sox were ahead five runs in the seventh. Yes, Jeffrey, you were right and I was wrong. Even though I was nearly right as the Red Sox proceeded to blow the five run lead and had to go into extra innings. Besides, there's no percentage in being an optimistic Sox fan. You know this. Consequently, there is no joy in being a fan. Only a feeling of being set up for even greater disappointment. Actually, that's kind of how I felt after Edwards mopped the floor with Cheney the other night.

There really is a lot to be said about the debate tonight, but what's the point? I got really excited a few times (enough to scare my dogs, although they should've been used to the shouting after the Red Sox game). I especially got excited when Bush yelled/whined at the moderator who had given him the go-ahead. I thought maybe it would be a turning point in the election. Alas, none of the networks cared to put that dramatic scene on a loop. And then they chose to spin what was clearly a knockout victory for Kerry as a draw or even a victory for Bush. Not that they were trying to appear fair or anything. And clearly no one pays attention to any of it anyway. I tend to think anyone responsible enough to sit home on a Friday night to watch a debate probably reads actual newspapers and already knows what's going on in the world and would never vote for Bush. I don't think the ridiculous timing was a coincidence.

Long-legged monkeys

2004-10-07T10:19:00.000-07:00

The Red Sox have only one more game to win out of three. And the next two of those games will be in Fenway Park. Think they can't mess it up now? I fully expect this series to go 5 games. After all, we have Arroyo pitching tonight and either the tanking D-Lowe or an also-suffering Tim Wakefield pitching game 4. Does anyone else find it ominous that no one will say which one yet? But, my prediction is that the wonderful Mr. Schilling will bail them out on Sunday. Amen.

Unity

2004-10-06T13:33:00.000-07:00

I think the one place where Edwards could really have stolen the election was the final question about unity. This is the place he really could've shifted the focus of the election from minutiae to a broader, forward-looking focus, Bill Clinton style. Unfortunately, he blew it by almost immediately reverting back to health care questions.

Truncated transcript:

IFILL: Whichever one of you is elected in November -- you mentioned those three electoral votes in Wyoming and how critical they've turned out to be.But what they're a sign of also is that you're going to inherit a very deeply divided electorate, economically, politically, you name it.How will you set out, Mr. Vice President, in a way that you weren't able to in these past four years, to bridge that divide?

CHENEY: Well, I must say it's one of the disappointments of the last four years, is that we've not been able to do what the president did in Texas, for example, when he was able to reach across the aisle and bring Democrats along on major issues of the day...We used to be able to do more together on a bipartisan basis than seems possible these days. I'm not sure exactly why. I think, in part, it may be the change in the majority-minority status in the Senate has been difficult for both sides to adjust to.And the Senate, of course, has been very evenly divided, 50-50, then 51-49, then 49-51 the other way.We'll keep working at it.

EDWARDS: Thank you.The president said that he would unite this country, that he was a uniter, not a divider.Have you ever seen America more divided? Have you ever seen Washington more divided?The reality is it is not an accident. It's the direct result of the choices they've made and their efforts that have created division in America. We can do better than that in this country.Cheney admitted defeat on this one and basically tried to blame it on the lack of bipartisanship of the Democrats. Which is exactly where Edwards should have pounced on. The September 11 attacks caused a surge of national unity unprecedented in my lifetime. Really, it was a gift from the sky for Bush. And people loved the way it felt. And politicians were willing to transcend partisan politics (if only because they would look petty, and dare I say, "unpatriotic" if they didn't.) And instead of using that unity to bypass traditional politics and really create bold initiatives, the Bush administration squandered every bit of it and more to create an unjust, impractical, costly war. If ever there was a time for Edwards to paint the broad picture of this, that question was it. He could have won Americans' hearts by saying something to the effect of, "We can achieve that feeling again. But it will never happen when this administration is in office. Because the way these people play the game is dirty and divisive, and [cue their overused "America can do better" phrase]. He could have hammered this point home (clearly subtlety is lost on most voters). But instead of pursuing this issue (which was Edwards's own gift from the sky), he chose to go back to health care.

lisadare broccoli

2004-10-06T13:15:00.000-07:00

I'm floating the idea of changing the name lisadare broccoli after a recipe Daisy named after me. It would be followed by the sooo-cute caption "broccoli for your brain...not necessarily tasty, but good for you."

If anyone read this blog, I would take a poll. As it is, I'm on my own.

Wrong side

2004-10-05T21:52:00.000-07:00

And speaking of being on the wrong side of every issue, I'm starting a file. But I don't have anything to put in it yet because the New York Times' search mode is down. But I'll start with student loan loopholes and whistleblower legislation.

Meals on Wheels

2004-10-05T21:49:00.000-07:00

Hands down, my favorite part of the debate was when John Edwards was discussing Cheney's voting record and said, "He even voted against funding Meals on Wheels for seniors." Man, I hope that gets picked up as a sound byte. It was funny (great delivery) and it plays right into Cheney's image as an archetypal villain.

Victory

2004-10-05T21:15:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe that I'm more excited about Edwards winning the debate than the Red Sox winning game 1 of the ALDS. Let's hope this kind of thing doesn't shape opinion too much. Without question, John Edwards ate Cheney alive. I've never seen Ed "Giggly" Gillespie sweat more in my life. Oh, and I would like to say how unethical it is for people to be trying to falsely spin the debate results and polls, but I happen to have voted three or four times for Kerry in every debate poll I saw last week. Just doing my part to keep the truth in focus. Okay, I lie, I'm trying to give a miniscule push to a pathetic candidate who bungled the debate, has no political courage or scruples, and whose bumper sticker I sport as visibly as possible in the rear window of my husband's car.

2004-10-04T22:07:00.000-07:00

Archbishop Desmond Tutu appeared on the Daily Show tonight. Need I say more? Isn't that strange enough? It turns out he has the most astonishing, radiant...giggle. He's a giggler. And he watches the Daily Show. In the movies, the villains have all the fun.

Backlash

2004-10-04T17:28:00.000-07:00

I read a very encouraging article about how the stagnant state of popular music was actually a good thing. The author cited examples of periods dominated by truly insipid music (read: disco) that gave way to a backlash of great music (like early 1980's punk). Each time, the terrible state of mainstream music disgusted people so much that they started searching for something, anything different, thus creating a small window for alternative forms to creep in and take hold. He predicted that the over-produced, vapid, mind-numbing music scene was on the brink of giving way to a fabulous rennaissance any day.

I'm hoping this political era plays out something like that. Maybe all these terrible things happening in politics right now are a blessing in disguise, priming us for a backlash. Maybe increasing government powers, particularly executive ones, are going to incite people to forcefully defend their freedoms, instead of compromising and letting them slip slowly away, one by one. Maybe we will remember what it takes to be good citizens because of adversity. The moralizing, conformity and Communist-hunting of the fifties gave way to the socially liberal and politically active sixties. I know that the events of the last three years have made me sit up and start paying attention. I didn't even vote in the last election. Because I couldn't choose between the two candidates (please, don't tell anyone. My friends would lynch me). And now that person I was then, the one who thought that maybe Al Gore did claim to have invented the Internet, seems as alien to me as, well, the truth is to the Bush administration.

Or maybe I'm just a blind optimist who can't believe that things are really going to continue in this direction. That government surveillance is going to invade every aspect of our lives, that labor protections will disappear, that we will sell out all the resources of our world for quick profit, etc. Maybe I just need to believe that Americans will wake up one day and realize...that just because it's really scary and maybe smacks a little of conspiracy theory, doesn't mean it's not true that our government is lying to us all the time and acting mainly for the personal profit of a few.

I would really like to be right about this. History moves in cycles, right? But I have my doubts...that article I read predicting imminent backlash against silly pop music was written at least five years ago. I guess it goes without saying that I'm still waiting.